So far, the two species that have fucked 'em up the most have been bunnies and flightless birds...This! This is why I never want to go to Australia.
Where I'm from the things that are most likely going to kill you are bears and the weather. And I'm not too worried about a bear making a stealth attack on my wedding tackle while I'm on the toilet.As opposed to the US, where the black widow is (and is just as bad?). Though we probably win for snakes, but you really need to worry about horses, cows and dogs because of their proximity to people - they're the ones most likely to kill you anywhere (add donkeys, camels etc for regional variants)
"Nice party, huh?"Ars is headquartered in Chicago, right? Can you dispatch a beat reported to stay on top of this?![]()
Alt - someone you're attracted to:"I'm on the glitter desk."
I’m trying to figure out the geometry of a black widow sized spider hiding under the toilet seat and then biting you on the dick. All I can come up with is “he knows you’re not supposed to have your dick touching the underside of the seat, right?”Australia ftw
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-37481251
Though the headlines need to be clearer that it was probably separate spiders, not the same spider making another go of it.
A lack of emotional maturity can be very valuable in climbing a hierarchy. Being a vicious egomanic under a thin veneer of responsibility is a real advantage. Same as it ever was, those who are possessed by the desire for power are the least suited to wield it.I've finally codifed a month or two ago what I've noticed from my ~40 years on this Earth; too many people grow older, not more mature.
Are we sure it was bad luck? Maybe he's hoping one day his colleagues will try and suck out the venom.Australia ftw
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-37481251
Though the headlines need to be clearer that it was probably separate spiders, not the same spider making another go of it.
Donuts.Ordering them a dozen hotdogs with ketchup would be funnier.
ChicagoDonuts.
Sounds like everyone with any responsibility is part of the "You scratch my back..." club, they will delete everything. The out of town lawyer they bring in to defend the civil suit will shout "Settle!" and walk out again.This guy is going to have a field day with subpoenas for police emails and other stuff related to his case. With as thinned skinned as these police seem, the likelihood that the chief or others wrote something embarrassing is pretty high. There’s a good chance they pay him off to get away from that. Of course it won’t cost them anything personally.
Are we sure it was bad luck? Maybe he's hoping one day his colleagues will try and suck out the venom.
I’m trying to figure out the geometry of a black widow sized spider hiding under the toilet seat and then biting you on the dick. All I can come up with is “he knows you’re not supposed to have your dick touching the underside of the seat, right?”
Most people don't try and ride bears, but they fall off and get trampled by horses all the time...Where I'm from the things that are most likely going to kill you are bears and the weather. And I'm not too worried about a bear making a stealth attack on my wedding tackle while I'm on the toilet.
Is that New York style pizza? Those scoundrels!It’s worse than that. They ordered the thin crust pizza “pie cut”
Only Chicago residents will understand that
So far, the two species that have fucked 'em up the most have been bunnies and flightless birds...
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Yeah. That’s not the issue though. They think he was bitten by a spider that really isn’t all that big and doesn’t jump. And he claims to have looked carefully, first, so it probably isn’t that he was sitting in the middle of its web, which would otherwise be a possibility considering how black widow webs are built. So he had to have his Johnson pretty much right up against an interior surface of the toilet.Water in an Australian toilet is much lower than in a US toilet, so there's plenty of room for the spider to just sit there. In a portaloo or an outhouse there's plenty of opportunity for bugs to be attracted to the smell and so make a good feeding site for the spider, so its supposed to be normal practise to check before sitting.
"appear to have been made in bad faith."
Aren't there versions where they are not to be inhaled at?... (In fairness, a glitter bomb is not to be sneezed at).
That's what ya'll get for not keeping Crocodile Dundee contained in your own borders, mate. Seriously, the only land borders ya'll have are with more australia - how hard could it be?Cane toads and foxes too. No wonder we're rather serious on biosecurity now, when it's rather too late.
Being from the UK, I see an unfortunate connection with SeanJW's link, https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-37481251"Nice party, huh?"
"Sure is! So what do you do?"
"I work for Ars Technica, a venerable and well-respected tech and science blog."
"Fascinating! What do you write about?"
"I'm on the glitter desk."
". . . ."
Yeah. That’s not the issue though. They think he was bitten by a spider that really isn’t all that big and doesn’t jump. And he claims to have looked carefully, first, so it probably isn’t that he was sitting in the middle of its web, which would otherwise be a possibility considering how black widow webs are built. So he had to have his Johnson pretty much right up against an interior surface of the toilet.
Oh man thank goodness the court didn't create an entire legal theory out of thin air that gives police immunity from civil rights suits decades before that ruling. If they had that whole thing would just be another time that Scalia was a lying piece of shit.Another reminder that Scalia was doing the best deadpan comedy of his career when he wrote "many forms of police misconduct are deterred by civil-rights suits, and by the consequences of increasing professionalism of police forces, including a new emphasis on internal police discipline" in Hudson v. Michigan. Straight face the whole time.
Wait, is that what Down Under was about?Clearly he didn't look carefully enough. Toilet seats are common enough sites for them that there's even a song about it.
The police then issued their press release, letting their community know that West had witnessed "demeaning comments in reference to his supervisory position within the department from Kovac’s posts on social media"—which doesn't sound like any sort of crime.
The DA should be blamed for taking the case, not for losing the trial. Unlike cops DAs have law degrees, so they're supposed to be constitutionally well versed. But that DA pressed charges for constitutionally protected speech. The judge should have fined them for wasting their time.The cops blaming the DA for losing the trial is bonkers.
I wish we would be privy to follow ups between the cook county DAs and Orland Park, cause I can't imagine that's going to go well. Imagine the ego to abuse your power, get gut checked on it, then blame the DA over being wrong.
This happening in Orland Park is hardly surprising, though.
some people can get distracted by other things and then plan a heist to steal the toilet itself instead: £4.8m Golden Toilet Heist.Clearly he didn't look carefully enough. Toilet seats are common enough sites for them that there's even a song about it. Sitting down will certainly get you close enough to annoy a spider.
A classic would have been to order a huge number of assorted donuts to be delivered to the police station anonymously via burner email, uber eats, and a pre-paid CC.Ordering them a dozen hotdogs with ketchup would be funnier.
Where I'm from the things that are most likely going to kill you are bears and the weather. And I'm not too worried about a bear making a stealth attack on my wedding tackle while I'm on the toilet.
I have had the weather make a stealth attack mind you. There's nothing like those polar vortexes whistling down the vent pipe and up about your bits to make you reconsider some life choices.Where I'm from the things that are most likely going to kill you are bears and the weather. And I'm not too worried about a bear making a stealth attack on my wedding tackle while I'm on the toilet.
I know cops liking donuts is a stereotype, but would they really be pissed to get free snacks? Or by huge did you mean a truly unreasonable amount of donuts?A classic would have been to order a huge number of assorted donuts to be delivered to the police station anonymously via burner email, uber eats, and a pre-paid CC.
It's not bad, but it's hard to beat the classics, such asBest headline ever![]()
The three acts mentioned were:Orland Park was not backing down, however, blaming prosecutors for the loss. "Despite compelling evidence in the case, the Cook County State’s Attorney’s Office was unable to secure a prosecution, failing in its responsibility to protect Deputy Chief West as a victim of these malicious acts," the village manager told Patch.
A "classic" Chicago hotdog is with mustard, relish, onions, tomato, pickle, hot peppers, and never ketchup. Donuts they get a free snack, dogs with ketchup they get a free "fuck you" from the kitchen staff and delivery driver.A classic would have been to order a huge number of assorted donuts to be delivered to the police station anonymously via burner email, uber eats, and a pre-paid CC.
The prosecutors should sue the cops for defamation.The cops blaming the DA for losing the trial is bonkers.
I wish we would be privy to follow ups between the cook county DAs and Orland Park, cause I can't imagine that's going to go well. Imagine the ego to abuse your power, get gut checked on it, then blame the DA over being wrong.
This happening in Orland Park is hardly surprising, though.
The really dissapointing part is that most other major news outlets DON'T cover this story.The really hilarious part is that a major technical site decided to cover this story. I look forward to a coming analysis of dancing cats.
Sent them the "Chicago" deep dish from Gordano's or Lou Malnati's.It’s worse than that. They ordered the thin crust pizza “pie cut”
Only Chicago residents will understand that